Five minutes? Uh oh. I started to panic. Had I not been pulling my weight around the Dyer household? Were my peanut butter, honey and banana sandwiches just not cutting it anymore? Did I need to learn new skills like mastering the Wii "I Spy" game or coloring with chalk? Was I being furloughed? Laid off?
"Zach's office door. Only 1 visitor allowed. Everybody allowed except the people I do not want in my office door. Private door. Tomorrow's appointments: 5:58 --- 6:00 ?" Originally he spelled Office Door like this: "Office Dore." I sat down at the table. He looked at me. He had a pencil and a blank piece of paper. Was he going to take notes? Make me take a test?
"Sign here." The paper was blank. What was I signing? Did I need a lawyer present?
"Mom, I want to talk about Sportsmanship."
Sportsmanship? My mind raced. Zach had his last soccer game on Saturday. Was I unsportsmanlike? I thought back to his game. I didn't think I did anything wrong. I took pictures, clapped at the appropriate time and high-fived him when he scored a goal.
"What is sportsmanship?" he asked. I gave him four concepts of what good sportsmanship meant to me. He wrote down all of them, occasionally asking for clarification and the spelling of words like "positive" and "attitude."
The meeting lasted about three minutes. He thanked me for my time and wrote "please come again." We shook hands.
Not to be outdone, I saw this on Adam's door.
Adam announced he was now taking appointments too. Grandma Agnes was first, then Oma. My turn next. I sat down at his desk, where everything was neatly in its place (eerily similar to that of Scott's desk at work).
"Tell me why Legos are good toys."A LEGO question? Didn't he know I wasn't versed in the science of Legos? Isn't this question more suited for Scott or Zach? I gave him several examples: they work your brain and teach you to follow directions. They are brightly colored and help with fine motor skills. He wrote all my answers in a Spiderman notebook labeled "meting" notebook. I could tell the notebook was important because he labeled a special place for it: "Meting notebook here" with an arrow. See picture above.
"Show me how to play with this Star Wars spaceship."
A presentation? I wasn't prepared for that! I just had to wing it, speak off the cuff. I started flying the ship around his room, making spaceship and explosion sounds, which is definitely not one of my talents.
"Uh mom?" He interrupted me. "You're flying it backwards."
I looked at the ship, and back at Adam. I'm sunk.
He burst out laughing. Whew! Glad to know he has a sense of humor. He let me start over.
After my demonstration he gave me a grade. C.
A "C"? Wow. Tough crowd. I know I got off to a bad start and my sound effects are not up to par, but I'm willing to practice. I wonder if he knew of any classes I could take about the subject? Or maybe professional development opportunities?
"Watch me. This is how it's done."
He proceeded to make all the cool sounds: rocker booster, machine gun, landing gear, explosions. And while my ship flied consistently at the same altitude, his flew high (jumping onto his bed, even) and really low so it was almost level with the floor. Then it even came in for a slow, steady landing.
I gave him an A.
His meetings with Oma, Grandma Agnes and Scott were quite interesting. He developed his topic based on each person's interest or world of knowledge. For example, he knew Oma preaches the importance of healthy eating habits so his topic for her was "how to eat healthy." Grandma Agnes is almost 98, so her topic? "How to stay alive." Papa didn't have time for his appointment, but I found out it was "how to do the news."
Later in the day, this sign was posted.
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